These are currently in no particular order, and I expect to update this post several times as I think through this issue.
- Me.com or Apple.com
- Didn't fully use the internet until they bought an iPhone.
- Loves to hate Microsoft products.
- Brings out phone to show pictures of children, food, or recent vacation shots in an aggressive, unpleasant manner.
- Will freak out when MobileMe shuts down in June, 2012.
- Thinks the term "App" means something specifically about iPhone.
- Believes Steve Jobs was an inventor/scientist.
- AOL.com
- Old person.
- Probably does not know what a scroll bar is.
- Thinks PowerPoint users are technology geniuses.
- Externalizes internet problems.
- Believes that prior to retirement, Bill Gates knew when they opened an email.
- Frequent Facebook poster, uses "post to board" instead of "private message" causing everyone embarrassment.
- Comcast.net
- Probably a converted AOL user.
- Knows how to unplug a router to restore Comcast service, or has a younger person around who does this for them.
- Doesn't know IMAP from a hole in the ground.
- Thought the hacker scenes in "Swordfish" were believable.
- Leaves hundreds of application windows open and rarely restarts machine.
- Gmail.com
- Watched Tron 2010 in 3D the first month it came out.
- Owns an Android phone but has bought at least one Apple device.
- Has an opinion about password length.
- Owns, or has considered owning a Prius.
- Wears goofy shoes.
- Cuts off bicycles when driving, but hogs lane when riding bike.
- Yahoo.com
- Buys the magazines found at grocery store cash registers.
- Forwards spam email to friends.
- Computer(s) infected with multiple viruses
- Never backs anything up.
- Asks people simple questions that could easily be Googled from the phone they are holding.
- Possible creationist.
